Usefullness

On wednesday of this week I delivered a project that I have been working on daily since september. It was bittersweet though....... I was able to breathe easy for the first time in months. I had aterrific sense of accomplishment for the first time in perhaps years. Unfortunately, it only generates two things. First, people will spend three months questioning my choices on that project, and secondly, I know there are just more projects to be started, fretted over, and ultimately delivered. I think its akin to a parent of an unruly child still being sad when that child leaves the nest.

So here I am, wondering what next? I spend 6 months feeling useless. Than in one week I find myself being johnny-on-the-spot. Helping coworkers. Fixing issues, easing crises. I wrap it up with that project submission, and now I am wandering aimless. I have a few small hypercritical but ultra short delivery projects and then months of travel to support the bigee, but no more deliverables...... No goals....... Just a quagmire.

What to do?